The meaning of Sophie is “wisdom” – try and keep the howls of laughter to a minimum please. Anyone who knows me will agree that this is NOT the best word to describe me, in fact classy and demure would suit me better – and THAT’S saying something…
But I guess it depends on what we think of when we hear the word “wisdom”.
Back in school my maths teacher would joke about the meaning of my name in relation to my ability (or inability) to recite the times tables or do long division; some of my friends would give me THAT pat on the shoulder or head whenever I pulled another “soph-esque” face palm moment and I had plenty of dumb blonde jokes thanks to my original hair colour (yes I WAS a natural blonde)
Of course all of the above was said and done in jest, many were friends whom knew me well enough to know I could easily shrug it off and laugh at myself when I did something silly… But when you hear something enough it kind of becomes part of normality, you almost buy into the jokes and for me, without meaning to, it became negative. Somewhere down the line people thought it was ok to say to me how they thought I “played up” my stupidity but the truth is I’m NOT THAT CLEVER. My geography sucks big time, history and politics makes me glaze over and currently my knowledge of any world events is courtesy of my Facebook or Twitter feeds but that’s not wisdom is it? That’s knowledge and you know what? It just doesn’t interest me, I know it should, I try to stay informed but no matter how much crap that’s thrown at me it refuses to stick.
Looking back it seems I clung to the negativity and completely misinterpreted what my name really meant. Wisdom isn’t all about knowing the facts, even if it was I still came out with GCSEs, A-Levels and a BAHons (albeit in fashion – again stop laughing lol) but it’s is more about experience, common sense and good judgement. And really it seems – at least to others- that that was me all over. My friends were only allowed to go to school parties if I was going because if I was there it meant there was “at least one responsible one” (don’t ask where their parents got this idea from lol) I was the younger but more “down to earth”, “logical” and “level headed” sister who wound up her older one because my curfew was later regardless of the 5yr age gap; I’ve been told to consider becoming a policewoman due to my perceptiveness and rationale, or a counsellor thanks to my understanding and insight….
And then I go and throw a spanner in the works by getting pregnant whilst in the early stages of “dating” someone (if you can call it that) or I marry someone after “knowing” them for 6 short months… Or I “drag my son away from his dad” to live in another country with my new husband…. And all of those things are crazy! … But I did them, and my friends and family supported me… Because guess what? Because they know me, they know my situation and they know I have it covered.
They know I would have considered every outcome, they trust that I have thought things through… That I’ve done my homework, that I’ve got options and fall back plans… And they’re right! It’s not because I’m a pessimist, it’s because I have learned from my past experience. I have learnt that things don’t always go to plan, that curveballs are thrown and you just have to take them as they come; I’ve learned that even after years of “knowing someone” they can still break your heart or shock you in ways you never dreamed of… That life is short, that it’s better to have taken a leap of faith than to ALWAYS wonder “what if” when it’s too late.
Babies, marriage, international moves… They’re all kind of a big deal and yet for me all three of them happened unexpectedly. All three threw me completely but I took them in my stride and welcomed their life lessons. Of course I’m not claiming to be overflowing with wisdom – though I wouldn’t blame you for thinking that after reading my recent guest post on the subject ;)… but in reality I still have a LOT to learn. What I do know is that I’m much stronger than I thought I was; I’m adaptable and less “set in my ways” than I used to think, I’m open minded, understanding and I trust myself…but most of all I have learned that I’m NOT stupid… Just don’t make me take a test to prove that 😉